UPDATE ON REAL LIFE


Today marks the second "month-day" of Eva and here I am writing another post with her in my arms.
Since this date lands on a Monday I thought why not leave all the other posts for later and share a little update on how life has been in the past couple of months.

Before Eva was born I was bombarded with opinions and advises from other people, being these parents or not, but especially moms, of course.
Words like "Freeze food because in the first months you won't be able to do anything", "The toilet will be your sanctuary, if you're lucky" and "Forget taking showers, you won't have time for that, get some rest instead because you'll need it" never scared me. In fact, I always thought people were being a bit dramatic and that I would get the hang of it in no time.
In reality, it didn't change much. Of course I have a couple of minutes once in a while when I wish that I could pause time and do my own stuff and have time just for myself again, but to be honest I don't think that I can complain much.
I never thought that parenthood would be any easier, especially in the beginning, and maybe it was that mindset that made me handle everything a bit more smoothly.
And by all means I don't want to discriminate anyone else's experiences, I know that all babies are different, but let me tell you that Eva can sometimes be a tough little cookie. Don't let her pretty face mislead you.
I can still take my showers, go to the toilet, prepare meals and eat them as well, all this from day one.
The big difference is that I have spare fingers to count the times I left the shower without Eva crying, or that as soon as I felt the toilet seat on my butt she would start screaming. And eating... Well, let me tell you that most of the days having breakfast were just not possible and making a choice between eating a warm meal or eating alone can be quite frustrating sometimes.
It feels as if she reads my mind most of the times. She can be sleeping, or happy and quiet but if I think of doing something she will immediately wake up and ask for attention. Luckily, I have David helping out and balancing the workload and my mind! If it wasn't for his peace of mind sometimes, Uff...
It's funny how life changes and with it, your perspective of things. Now the shower became my place of peace, where I can only hear the water coming down (and sometimes Eva screaming in the back of my head). Since the day I gave birth to Eva, every shower, no matter how long, makes me feel like I am being reborn.
Eva is now sitting on my lap kicking the edge of the laptop with her little feet and I can't believe how fast she's grown.
Since a couple of weeks we let her sleep in her crib and, excluding a couple of days that she struggled a bit with colic, we have been quite lucky that she sleeps around four hours straight, wakes up in the middle of the night to nurse and falls back to sleep with no fuss or crying. Well, this is at least until morning, because when she actually wakes up, opens her eyes and decides that the day should start from there, then there is nothing I can do besides getting up and play with her. But as soon as she smiles and starts "talking" all my grumpiness goes away.
I can't believe that within a couple of weeks I will be back to my work routine and with it Eva will be at the daycare all day. It is so unfair that you'd spend most of your life in a daycare, kindergarten, later school and then work.
I remember being a kid and thinking about the time I would actually spend with my parents per day. If it wasn't for the weekends I would only see them tired from work and a couple of hours per day before going to bed. How bad is that? On one hand I don't want Eva to be that kind of kid, but on the other hand, we both have to work out of the house and so what choice do I have besides enjoying every second we have together. At least, for now, she wants to spend time with me, let's see how that works when she becomes a teenager.
So yeah, you can say that it has been quite a journey and I spend most of my days struggling to have something done, not only because of her being awake but also because of sleep deprivation (that big monster who makes you feel like you have no self-will) but every single time I look at her I just fall completely in love all over again and that makes every single second worth. Not to mention the amount of time I spend per day laughing out loud.



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